|Marriage means work

On the way home, walking as a stranger in the fear of the Lord

(2016)

Marriage means work

For years we have had a passion for marriages to be good, strong and sustainable. God has created marriage to help each spouse to become a better version of themselves. This is true for both Christians as well as Muslims. These courses are designed for couples who consider their marriage worthwhile enough to invest in it.

That is why we offer various training courses:

Program

During the training, partners discuss important topics together, such as division of roles, communication, personality styles, dealing with conflict and how to keep the romance alive. We do not offer couples therapy but a marriage enrichment. We think it is important that everyone continues to work on their relationship and we want to provide them with tools for this. It is for any married couple, Muslims and Christians, who want to maintain a good marriage. An MOT for the relationship.

We are not professionals, who have know it all. We are fellow learners who are married for more than 40 years and who want to share knowledge, skills and materials with others to benefit from.

On the way home, walking as a stranger in the fear of the Lord

(2016)

On the way home, walking as a stranger in the fear of the Lord

(2016)

Marriage enrichment weekend

Together with our Muslim friends we organize an intercultural and interreligious marriage enrichment weekend for Christians and Muslims in a hotel. This is meant for people who want to deepen their relationship.

In addition, we are also available to speak at marriage enrichment weekends in Christian churches or do a series of evenings on marriage.

We usually start with a general introduction with some teaching, and also provide assignments (as a couple or individual) and discussion questions. Our training is always very interactive and practical. 

Jenny about marriage:

Bert and I are the opposite. So even if you are like that you can be married for 40 years. You have to be alike, but can be yourself. You have to learn how you relate to each other. That's why marriage is a long-term thing because you need a while to discover that and to learn that. It's really a learning process, you don't master that after 5 years. I sometimes don't understand how God brought us together and kept us together.

We often seem to come from different planets. However, I'm still crazy about him. We both have our weaknesses, which are still there of course. We have learned from each other how to deal with these. Emotionally, I am a very sensitive person. I learned from Bert to think and make decisions with my head. Things can be very close to your heart, but you have to learn to let go.

In preparation for each marriage course, we go through the material ourselves so that we know where we talk about. As we do this, new things come up every time that we need to work on or pay attention to.

On the way home, walking as a stranger in the fear of the Lord

(2016)

On the way home, walking as a stranger in the fear of the Lord

(2016)

Bert about marriage:

We have always found it very important to invest in our relationship. To make time for each other and to get to know each other better. To enjoy being together and to complement to each other. To take each other's strength into account and to know each other's weaknesses, without taking advantage of it. That you respect each other and that you value each other. When the kids were little, we dealt with this differently than now they are out of the house. If you don't pay attention to your relationship, it won't automatically get better. It usually gets worse.

We are aware that we are also given to each other by God. The order of priority is: God, first, then your family and then your work. To be honest, I haven't always followed that. God was at the top, the family was not always second, sometimes third and work came second. 

Jenny and I are very different. It is therefore important to continue to invest in this relationship. It is a gift from God to which you must also pay attention and care. We both come from families where things went differently. Also around us we often see how things go wrong or that people do not fully enjoy their marriage. So we want to set a good example ourselves. 

Testimonials

Rie en Lewalt Eland Participant marriage enrichment weekend

Bert and Jenny have a disarming style, in which you feel seen and recognized. The examples were always personal, but never too heavy-handed. Instructors who can put themselves in perspective are a real blessing. Especially in the good mix between a smile and a tear, a Biblical admonition and an arm around you. Fortunately, with many assignments that you carried out with your partner and the homework that had to be done during the weekend, it really turned out to be a practical weekend. We realized how precious and fragile marriage really is, a wonderful gift.

Participant marriage enrichment weekend Participant marriage enrichment weekend

We experienced it as a good, meaningful and beautiful weekend. It was constructive, deepening strenuous and relaxing at the same time.

Participant marriage enrichment weekend

We should have a refresher course like this every year, because I still benefit from it every day.

Participant marriage enrichment weekend

It was a very nice weekend, you can really see that marriage has your heart and you really radiate that it is important to invest in it.

en_GBEnglish (UK)